Can you catch depression?
Everyone seems to disappear when one is depressed. In all honesty, there's quite a bit of causation on the depreseé's part, and of course, the altered perception of reality.
But when you know of someone who is depressed, do you ever talk to them?
*****
Christie told me I was happy, or some shit like that. She'd probably say something like, "Cut the bullshit."
And I'd say, "That's all that comes out of my mouth. I can shut up if you want to, but we all know that's not possible."
But she took it back, so that conversation is no longer possible.
It's difficult for an individual to petition the group without feeling like an obtrusively centric burden.
Too often do my written pieces fall back to the theme of interpersonal dynamics and my idealistic theories to overcoming my inadequacies of. To cut the bullshit, yes: I am having problems. Problems of my own making, problems of my imagination, problems that I have resolved to make order of on my own taught as per a former-lover-fiasco I once witnessed.
Back to the theoretical bullshit.
My pursuit of this particular individual is symbolic, I think. Or parallel. I'm not sure. I'm still trying to sort this out. (relation to past experience/context/contrived wisdom?)
If these efforts are indicative of anything, it's dissatisfaction. (Well, duh.) Dissatisfaction on so many levels. Dissatisfaction with my romantic desperation, my romantic solitude, dissatisfaction that it is a voluntary solitude, that I care so much about my romantic condition, and so on. (I would list further, but considering that Dissatisfaction is the theme of this entire entry, I should not digress)
And so I have a conflict of interests: emotional and philosophical. (This is an overused motif in television and books and is easy to relate to, so I feel so cliche explaining it over again to myself and to whoever may read this). Emotionally, I desire companionship and philosophically, I should not desire so passionately, so... impatiently something that is ultimately and arguably worthless in the end.
And I'd say, "That's all that comes out of my mouth. I can shut up if you want to, but we all know that's not possible."
But she took it back, so that conversation is no longer possible.
*****
It's difficult for an individual to petition the group without feeling like an obtrusively centric burden.
Too often do my written pieces fall back to the theme of interpersonal dynamics and my idealistic theories to overcoming my inadequacies of. To cut the bullshit, yes: I am having problems. Problems of my own making, problems of my imagination, problems that I have resolved to make order of on my own taught as per a former-lover-fiasco I once witnessed.
Back to the theoretical bullshit.
My pursuit of this particular individual is symbolic, I think. Or parallel. I'm not sure. I'm still trying to sort this out. (relation to past experience/context/contrived wisdom?)
If these efforts are indicative of anything, it's dissatisfaction. (Well, duh.) Dissatisfaction on so many levels. Dissatisfaction with my romantic desperation, my romantic solitude, dissatisfaction that it is a voluntary solitude, that I care so much about my romantic condition, and so on. (I would list further, but considering that Dissatisfaction is the theme of this entire entry, I should not digress)
And so I have a conflict of interests: emotional and philosophical. (This is an overused motif in television and books and is easy to relate to, so I feel so cliche explaining it over again to myself and to whoever may read this). Emotionally, I desire companionship and philosophically, I should not desire so passionately, so... impatiently something that is ultimately and arguably worthless in the end.
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